The innocent look is all an act.I recently received an email from a person, whom I do not know personally but is in a group I belong to, strongly suggesting that I change my URL because "if you mis-type it," you may be shocked and appalled to find yourself on a porn site. So I was kind of like, "well, um, if you type it correctly, you don't." That isn't really what I wanted to talk about but it has been bugging me a bit and I couldn't pass up the chance to use it as a segue to my Puppy Porn story.
There is a dog at the park named Joe. Joe is a 2-year old dog that looks just like a Golden Retriever but he is black, so he is obviously not a Golden Retriever. Joe is 100% enthralled with Lulu. Actually, Joe is 100% enthralled with humping Lulu. The last time we ran into Joe, he didn't care about playing, he didn't care about swimming, all he wanted to do was hump Lulu. Even more strange, there was another dog that would not let Joe get close to Lulu. It was like a very dysfunctional love triangle. Every time Joe tried to get to Lulu, the other dog would intervene, barking and keeping Joe at bay.
So today Lulu is playing with her new friend Blue and I see Joe running towards Lulu. He immediately jumps on Lulu and starts humping away. Blue, unlike no-name dog from above, saw no need to protect Lulu's virtue and ran off to find fun elsewhere. Meanwhile, Joe's owner is telling me that the love affair is about to experience a tragic demise, as poor Joe is getting fixed tomorrow. While I am contemplating the end of Joe's masculinity, someone says, "Oh my God, look!" I turn around to see Lulu laying FLAT on her back, legs splayed in the air, and Joe doing dirty, dirty things to her. Seriously. I would not kid.
I'm guess I'll just be thankful that I have a dog, not a daughter, as I have apparently, unwittingly, raised the town tramp that has no problem having sexual acts performed on her in the middle of the park. I would just like to note that I am sure that she inherited that trait from her father, not me.
3 comments:
I wish Blue could have been the valiant knight who saved the damsel, Lulu, from being exposed for all to see. Unfortunately, he was just the clumsy puppy trying so hard not to constantly trip over his own paws. I don't think much else was on his mind other than that. :)
Hope to see you, Bella, and Lulu at the park again!
~Brittany
He He. Lulu is looking forward to a romp at Turkey Creek with Blue. I hope he doesn't run into a tree ala Sonny Bono! :-)
Where's your email address?? We want to go to Turkey Creek tomorrow morning around 9 or so... email or call me: palmerb83@gmail.com, (512)373-0271
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